I Feel Selfish for Wanting Him to Stay Here Longer

The grief that accompanies death is difficult to subdue. I don't think anyone who's lost someone they truly love feels happy after they die. Even those with the greatest faith feel a sense of loss when a family member or great friend passes on to their heavenly reward.

In my case, I not only felt sad but I often felt selfish in the days surrounding my brother's death. I knew he'd accepted death and was not afraid of it. He didn't view death as an end and he "welcomed" it, as he often said.

Despite his embracing view of death, I was still hoping for a miracle for Michael. When I thought about why, the main reason was that I wanted to have him around longer because he was just such a great guy. He was a person I could go to for advice on things both spiritual and temporal because he was a great gauge of what was right and what was wrong. He had lived among so many for so long, and he had seen so much goodness combined with so much badness that he simply knew much more than the average person. I think now that maybe I was being selfish. I wanted Mike to be around to help me make decisions. Maybe he felt he had made enough. He was tired of making decisions and was ready to move on.

I am sad - selfish as this may be - for the fact that my unborn children will not know him. Assuming God grants me the gift of offspring, I'll be the only sibling with children who were not baptized by my brother; that one especially hurts me because I think it's such a privilege to have been baptized by a man like Fr. Michael Sepp.

Priest, Son, Brother, Friend

Fr. Michael Sepp was born into a modest New York family on March 11th, 1953. He was the first born son and the second child of Joan Duffy Sepp and Elmar Sepp. Elmar was an immigrant from Estonia who supported his new growing family by working as a carpenter. Joan had worked as a New York telephone company operator before settling into family life. They had six children by the time Michael was 17 years old. At the age of 24 he found God calling him to serve Him as a Catholic priest in the Archdiocese of New York. By the age of 29, he was ordained into the priesthood by Terence Cardinal Cooke in 1982. He served the parishes of St. Batholomew in Yonkers as a Deacon and then St. Rita's in Staten Island for his first parochial assignment as a priest. After serving the people of St. Rita's for six years, he chose to follow a call to become a missionary priest in South America. Michael loved the film "The Mission" and wanted to serve the poor. He went to Cochabamba, Bolivia to study Spanish while awaiting an assignment that never materialized. The political climate in Bolivia combined with a the death of his beloved Aunt Mary in New York, inspired him to return to New York where he felt he was needed and could do more. He was immediately assigned to Our Lady of Angels parish in the Bronx where he would serve for 6 years. There he honed his Spanish language skills. He soon found that there was a poor parish in Manhattan's Harlem that needed the help of a good priest. Michael was soon at Resurrection Church on West 151st Street. After six years of service as the pastor of Resurrection, Fr. Michael was then assigned to what would be his biggest challenge, Sacred Heart in the South Bronx. It was actually just over the Macombs Dam Bridge from Resurrection and an easy transition in some ways, but Sacred Heart, a much larger church and school, needed more attention and more of Fr. Michael's energy. He gave all of himself to Sacred Heart, as he did with each parish he was assigned to. A short time after taking the healm at Sacred Heart he was asked to add to that responsibility and take over as pastor of an additional church on Shakespeare Avenue called, St. Francis of Assisi. He certainly was a busy man and stayed that way until the end. Just days after his 56th birthday, on the night of March 13th, 2009. Fr. Michael Sepp gave up his earthly body and took his reward in Heaven.

This blog is meant as a tribute to Fr. Michael Sepp: an amazing priest, a perfect son, a loving brother and a dedicated friend. Feel free to post reply messages with nice or funny stories about Fr. Michael.